Percy's Embarrassment
by Rebel Glow
Summary: Percy is a clown, Annabeth is a queen, Piper is a servant and Leo is a queen's advisor. Enjoy! (Warning: This AU might be considered crack idk.) One-Shot


**For Fanfiction Imagination's Challenge E: Humor (2014-The Jester).**

_Hello! Welcome to a world where all of your favorite characters aren't who you think they are. In other words, we transported Percy to another world where he's a clown who works for the evil queen Annabeth. Enjoy._

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><p>Percy sits on his bed in the large, beautiful castle. It is in a small room, hardly fit for a king. There is one window, showing only bright, blue sky. The walls are bare. Colorless. In fact, the only colorful thing in the room is Percy. He is wearing his purple and green clown costume. His jester hat is in his hands. He is squeezing it, as though attempting to strangle it. But as we all know, hats are not alive. Therefore, they cannot be strangled and killed. The idea is silly.<p>

Percy gets up and walks over to a wall. He stares at it with such loathing. "Why do I have to be the clown?", he asks the wall. Behind the 'fourth wall' is the author, Rebel, giggling with insane satisfaction at Percy's embarrassment and misery. Percy stares at the wall for a few seconds, but his stare is broken when he jumps in fright. There was a knock at the door.

Without waiting for an answer, Piper walks in. She is wearing a servant dress, worn by use over these long years she has served Queen Annabeth. The plain, brown outfit is torn; the Queen forbids Piper from fixing it. She looks at Percy with sadness in her eyes. "The Queen wants to see you.", Piper says, her voice dripping with pity. Percy nods and follows Piper out of the room. He and Piper walk down a hall. The hall is nothing special. Suits of armor line it; appearing every few feet. Piper shuffles down the hall, her mannerisms reflecting her measly servant status. Her slippers don't make a sound as they make contact with the cold floor. Unlike Percy's clown shoes. His shoes, which are made of bright red rubber, squeak as he walks alongside Piper. The squeaks echo around the halls. Piper winces at each one. "I don't know what you're so upset about, Piper. You're not the one dressed up like a little kid's worst nightmare.", Percy grumbles. Piper stops.

She turns to face Percy. "You think I don't feel sorry for you?", she snaps. Percy shrugs. "This is a stupid idea. I don't want to be a clown. Rebel is just a sadistic-", Percy begins, but is cut off by Piper. "Percy, what are you talking about? You've been the queen's jester for years.", she says. Percy nods. "That's right. I forgot. For everyone except me, this is normal. I'm the only one who can see past the fourth wall.", he says. Piper steps back. "You're talking funny. What's a fourth wall?", she asks. She has never seen Percy act like this. Percy ignores her and continues to think over his situation. "There has to be a word for this. It's not exactly self-insert. But it's not alternate universe either, is it?", he wonders out loud. Piper is about to talk again when an odd sound booms through the halls. Both Percy and Piper cover their ears. It sounds like the Tardis, except ten times louder and a hundred times more annoying (if that's possible).

"That's Annabeth, isn't it?", the son of Poseidon asks. Piper nods. "The queen is angry. She only sounds that alarm when she's ready to explode. We should hurry.", she says, stating the obvious. She grabs Percy's hand. Together, they race through the halls until they reach a large, fancy set of doors. "Finally, the throne room!", Piper breathes. "I know.", Percy mutters to himself. Then, troubled, he glances at Piper, grabbing her hand before she can knock. "Piper, why did you say that?"

"Hm?" She turns to look at him.

"If you know that it's the throne room, and I'm _supposed _to know it's the throne room, why did you say it out loud? Why did you announce something that we both know out loud?"

Piper seems nervous. "I don't know..."

Percy nods, his expression unreadable. "It was obvious, too. No other set of doors could have possibly led to the throne room, they're all too plain." He thinks for a moment. "Poorly used exposition through dialogue.", he mutters.

Piper knocks tentatively on the door, trying to ignore Percy's odd behavior.

"ENTER!", screams a female voice.

Percy sighs. Piper pushes open the door and reveals the elegant throne room. The author would describe it more, but she's lazy and hates detailed descriptions of settings. Also, she'd rather just bombard you with pointless dialogue. Sometimes, she thinks she should just use script format.

Annabeth sits on her throne. Her queenly dress is...aw, heck it's a beautiful gown. You're gonna make me describe that, too?

Leo stands next to her throne. He wears the uniform of the queen's advisor. Don't ask me why I chose Leo to be her advisor. It's not like he threatened me or anything. Insert nervous laugh here.

"The queen wishes that her jester will entertain her.", Leo announces with a surprisingly sadistic grin. Piper flashes Percy a look of pity before she goes to stand next to Leo. "I can't believe you enjoy this.", she whispers to Leo. Leo's grin grows wider. "It's funny.", he whispers back. She turns her head away as Percy approaches Annabeth's throne. "Oh, grow a pair.", Leo tells her. Piper freezes. "What did you just say to me?", she manages to say, looking back in shock.

Percy looks at Annabeth. There is no pity in her gaze. She is trying to ignore Piper and Leo's chattering. For a few seconds, she seems to be deep in thought as she stares at Percy. Then, an excited smile forms on her face, as though she has had a brilliant idea. "Do a funny dance!", she commands. Percy laughs. "Um, no thanks.", he says. Piper gasps as Leo steps forward, toward Percy. Neither of these two had ever seen Percy defy their queen. "Do as the queen says! I don't want to hurt you.", Leo says, a warning obvious in his tone. Percy rolls his eyes. "You won't hurt me. This story is for a challenge and being OOC is against the rules. As it is, the author struggled to not make you a complete sadist. She'll try her best to keep you in character now.", Percy says. Leo comes to stand in front of Percy. "What are you talking about?", he asks, severely confused. "OOC means you're acting out of character. The author was going to make you very sadistic. I'm not sure why. She's got issues.", Percy explains. Leo thinks for a moment. Then, he slowly steps back from Percy, believing that the jester has finally gone insane. (Seriousness now though, bros and female bros. I'm a sadist butter nutter. You don't want to know what Leo did to Percy in the 'first draft'.)

"Now, do a dance for the queen!", Annabeth demands, her tone impatient. "What type of dance?", Percy asks, his voice betraying his emotional pain. The queen speaks up after considering this for a minute or two. "Do the Lamby Lamby dance.", Queen Annabeth requests, holding back giggles. Percy looks up at her. "You're kidding...right?", he asks. Annabeth grins.

Percy facepalms. "Oh gods, she's serious.", he mumbles. Leo steps back toward Piper, who is watching the display, horrified. Leo looks excited to see Percy perform the Lamby Lamby dance.

Percy stands there. He makes a pact with himself (mentally of course), swearing that he will never EVER do the Lamby Lamby dance, no matter what pain this alternate universe Annabeth might inflict upon him.

Piper, obviously, can't read Percy's mind. Although, it would be cool if she had that power. Think about that for a minute. It would be so cool. I would love to see Piper with mind reading abilities. Anyway, Piper doesn't know what Percy is thinking. So she actually believes that he's considering doing the dance. In an effort to stall, she speaks up. "He needs a lamb costume!"

Annabeth, Leo and Percy look at her curiously. She bows her head and mutters something about getting a costume from the back room. Quickly, she shuffles out of the throne room. Leo rubs his chin thoughtfully. "Since when do we have a back room?", he murmurs to himself. After a few moments of extremely awkward silence, Percy sighs loudly. "I think the author ran out of ideas. Either that or she needs some serious inspiration.", he muttered. Annabeth and Leo stare at him blankly. He looks back at them, wishing that they were back in his universe instead of this weird world where he was a clown for some reason.

Suddenly, there is a knock on the door to the throne room. (I almost misspelled throne...wow.)

Annabeth glances over to the door. She orders Percy to open it and he does, assuming it was Piper. To the surprise of everyone in the throne room, it is not Piper. Standing there, looking around shyly, is the author. (Self-insert HAHAHA) Her internet persona was Rebel. This is a short teenage girl with red hair and brown eyes. She wears a pair of glasses. Also, she kind of let this 'humor' story get a little out of hand...Okay, a lot out of hand.

"Hi, I'm-"

"I know.", Percy says, smiling sadly. "Rebel."

"Yeah.", Rebel says, glancing over Percy's shoulder at Annabeth and Leo. She snaps her fingers and they each disappear in a puff of smoke. Percy stares at the spot where Queen Annabeth once sat. "Where did they go?", he asks, his tone a perfect mix of concern, confusion and shock. "I wrote them out of the story.", Rebel explains, apologetic.

"Um, why?" Percy is tense, prepared for a fight, or at least an argument.

"I'm ending the story."

Percy blinks. "Um, why?"

Rebel rolls her eyes. "I ran out of ideas. I'm not going to have you do the Lamby Lamby dance. That would be outrageous."

Percy seems relieved, even though he wasn't planning on doing the dance anyway. He would have resisted against the worst possible torture.

Rebel continues. "I already wrote Piper out of the story when I ran into her in the hallway."

"Oh."

"Do you want me to end the story now?"

"Does that mean I go to back to my universe where Annabeth is my girlfriend and not a queen who orders me around?"

"...What is the difference?"

Percy glares at her. "I want to go back to Camp Half-Blood."

"Fine. You can. I'm ending the story now."


End file.
